With apologies to Ricky Bobby, it's time to add a little bake to that shake that is the NHL All Star Game.
Give it a little meaning.
No, not for Gary Bettman to get up on his soapbox, conveniently surrounded by the best players in the world, trumpeting the almighty praises of a league he has helped drive straight into the digger.
Not for the natural goal scorers who play the game with the intensity of a Wednesday night beer league, without worry of being laid out for admiring a pass.
Put something on the line. Give them something to play for. Something more than bragging rights.
Off with the kid gloves, damnit.
It's time to dangle a carrot and let that competitive edge come through.
It's a no-brainer. Home ice advantage for the winning conference in the Stanley Cup final.
Perked your ears up, didn't I?
It works for baseball, where the winning league gets the extra home game, if needed, for the World Series.
Says here it's time to cowboy up for Disney on I -oops, I mean the All-Star Game.
Oh, there's bound to be protest. The pessimists will argue that the league should be showcasing its best for the U.S. television audience - promoting the league as speed and finesse, without any hitting. And why risk injury to a superstar in a meaningless game, right?
What is this, UFC?
Blah, blah, blah.
Here's a Kleenex. Now go hug a tree.
No one is saying the players have to take out a knee or goon it up. Last time I checked, George Parros and Derek Boogaard won't be getting voted to the All-Star Game anytime soon.
And how many of these guys are really going to get physical? Ovechkin and Iginla might try to take someone's head off, but so be it. It happens 82 nights a year.
Why use the All-Star joke as a facade to veil what the game is all about?
It's time to give a little meaning to this fiasco.
Right now, it is nothing but a mockery of the game.